The infidel

I haven't been updating lately because I've had a bit of flu. Nice and early this year so let's hope I won't be getting it again. Unfortunately my illness meant that I lost my dull as fuck job in the screening rooms but I wasn't bothered at all, especially now I've got a nice new job in a real office with real people and lots of fucked up office politics to keep me busy.

My receptionista days are behind me for now as I am PA to a company manager. He's about 26 and has never had a PA before so I have no footsteps to follow in at all. He's a lovely guy and at the moment isn't treating me like a serf but things will change- they always do. In typically office fashion, he's fucking one of the junior secretaries and she seems to be having a hard time of it. I haven't met his wife yet but she phones up occasionally and I've had to take her stuff to the dry cleaners every now and again. As far as I know she's pregnant which makes me feel a bit bad for her but it's none of my business really. His mistress must be all of 18 but I think she reckons she's ion with a chance of usurping the current wife. I see her wandering past my open door around fifty times a day on the off chance she'll bump into him. I'm finding her quite useful for taking post down to the post room actually.

Not mush else happening. I'm quite near one of my old jobs so keep seeing hatchet-faced bastards from the past everywhere. That's the trouble with being a temp- only a footstep away from a skeleton in your closet.

You want answers? I got answers...

The lovely One Snarky Girl said I had an STD (one pleasure I've never had in real life thank god) which I think means I have to fill this in and post it here. So I have done.

Three people who make me laugh
1.My boyfriend Matthieu
2. Anyone who falls down a set of stairs
3. The man who stands outside my local tube station shouting "Piss! Piss to you all!"

Three things I can do
1. type faster than anyone I've ever met
2. be more polite than the Queen (when I wanna be)
3. whatever I want, whenever I want

Three things I can't do
1. accept that I really should have a permanent job
2. knitting
3. listen to the Spice Girls

Three things I'm doing right now
1. squinting at the screen
2. ignoring the phone
3. wondering why the phone receiver smells strangely

Three things I want to do before I die
1. this
2. that
3. the other

Three things I hate the most
1. men with sweat patches on their work shirts- deodorant is freely available, boys!
2. people with no manners
3. getting the tube on a hot day

Three things that scare me
1. unemployment
2. bosses with hard-ons that they don't really try to conceal.
3. bosses actually checking their phone bills and my internet use

Three things I don't understand
1. why do
2. fools fall
3. in love

Three skills I'd like to learn
1. if i don't know it, it ain't worth knowing
2. (except maybe tennis)
3. (and time travel)

Three ways to describe my personality
1. sharp
2. pentagonal
3. in disarray

Three things I think you should listen to
1. the door hitting the arse of an enemy as they leave your life for good
2. the hold music at channel four
3. god I don't know- whales having sex?

Things you should never listen to
1. a word any permanent member of staff tells you
2. radio one
3. your boyfriend having a post-curry shit.

Three favorite foods
1. pre-shit curry
2. anything italian
3. sushi

Three beverages I drink regularly
1. latte
2. camomile
3. tomato juice

Three shows I watched as a kid
1. blue peter
2. simon and the witch
3. my dad attempting to do the ironing- he was fucking useless but it was front row stuff.