Easter bunny boiler

As Easter approaches, office work slows down big time.

Because it's a four day weekend, all anybody talks about is what they're doing for Easter, all hopelessly trying to out-brag each other. So far I've heard about trips to Barcelona, Paris, Cannes, New York, Malta, the Algarve and a rather bizarre camping trip to-er- Kent. I'm not remotely interested in any of these details but I think somehow it makes them forget their otherwise dull existences to think that a receptionist might sit in awe and be impressed as they reel of itineraries that I wouldn't wish on a convicted serial killer.

I've been getting quite settled here now, though. I've been here for a couple of weeks and so am on first name terms with the delivery guys and regular callers, which is actually nice in a familiar kind of way. It was annoying, then, to receive a call from the girl I replaced to speak to my boss. I'd been told that she'd been sacked by the powers that be, but this young lady didn't seem to think that was the case.

After grilling me for what seemed like hours on what my position was and who I'd spoken to, she insisted that she was on extended sick leave but would be returning much, much sooner than expected. "So," she said in a maliciously over-bright tone, "I wouldn't get too comfortable if I were you."

"Oh, I won't," was my reply. "This chair's obviously more suited to a much larger frame, so I shan't be getting comfy any time soon, unless they replace the chair." She then rather shittily asked to speak to my boss and so I transferred her to his answer phone, which I know he hardly ever checks. In fact, he usually just gets me to go through the messages for him...